Beginnings

I told Shan that I decided to start a blog tonight and she said "I'm surprised it took you so long." I used to think that blogs were kind of ridiculous, but for some reason this afternoon I decided that I wanted to have one. For some reason, I felt this need to have an outlet to capture my thoughts. And that maybe, people would find it worth reading. And now that my MacBook is half-way to being a golden calf, I'll hopefully be able to post frequently.

I spent a while thinking about what my blog would be titled. I actually spent much longer than I'd like to admit to. I thought about using a phrase from one of my favorite songs, "From the Inside Out," but each of my favorite lines on it's own sounded weird. "My soul cries out" and "The cry of my heart" sounded emo-ish. And that's not what I'm going for. So I ended up with "toe the line," which is the title of a song by Stephen Speaks. Here are the lyrics:

"Toe the line again to see how far
I can run and still see where You are
Feel I've run this race a thousand years still I fall
These dirty feet calloused with the tread
And my eyes the eyes of dead men
Running far enough from my salvation
But only far enough to dip my feet

CHORUS: I am not pretending anymore
I am not at home
I am knocking at Your door
I am not at home, I am not at home, I am coming home

Toe the line again to see how far
I can run and still see where You are
Knowing full well what this grace has cost...
Seems this safety net's not made of lace
But the flowing river of Your grace
And who am I some selfish kid
To abuse this perfect love You give."

"Toe the line again and see how far, I can run and still see where you are." So much of the last 5 years of my life can be characterized by that line. I'm almost done with my 7th semester of college, and soon enough I'll have a job. A real job. I'm in the midst of my fourth year as a Young Life leader at Mason High School, and I have a lot of great relationships there...so much of my heart is invested there, and soon enough, I'll be moving on. But as some wise person noted, the end of each chapter in our lives means the beginning of a new one. As I sit here now, I've got opportunities (at least, the opportunity at opportunities) for a job, meaningful relationships that will last well past college, and specifically, one with a girl that I care about more than myself.

As many of you know, I'm 'that guy' that often needs to be retaught a lesson before it sticks, if it ever does, but here's hoping that as I toe this new line, I'll have my head up and focused on what's important. And I'm not talking about my blog :)

Thanks for reading. If you continue to tune in, I hope you find this humorous and insightful. Go to the well on the comments...I'd love to hear from you all.